Mary’s Advice

Rather than tell you my story, I thought I’d mention something that came to me a few depressions ago because someone might be able to use it. Maybe other people can suggest other “kindnesses?”

When my house is a total mess and the laundry and dishes are piled up and I am in bed for days … I make believe that someone (me) is sick in bed, and that I am just a friend lending a little hand.

So whenever I get up (drink, bathroom, etc.) I just pick up one thing and put it where it belongs. If I pass laundry, I’ll pick up one thing and put it in the basket. Or if I go to get a drink, I’ll wash one dish and put it away. Or if I have any energy, I’ll sort the laundry (not do it – hey, I’m just helping out here). Maybe later, I’ll do one load (smallest one!).

Anyway, when I start feeling better, things don’t look quite as horrible, and I feel like a friend popped in to help out. Because it made me feel good and “cared for”, I started doing this when I was feeling good. Now, I’ll do teeny parts of a job whenever I feel like it, so when I actually get down to doing the whole job, it’s not quite as bad.

It makes me feel like I did something nice for myself instead of sabotaging myself as I usually do. Sometimes I can actually do a lot of little things to help myself out. But doing this really does give me good feelings toward myself when I actually get down to doing the “real” job. I sort of remember and “thank” myself for the break.

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